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ANOTHER TIME I WAS WORKING WITH THESE GUYS WHO USED TO INSTALL GUTTERS ON HOUSES. THEY KNEW I WAS EASY PICKINS,
AND THEY PICKED ON ME MOST OF THE TIME[the rest of the time i insulted them viciously, and that`s why they picked on me. it
was always the same old story]. ONE EVENING I WAS UP ON A LADDER GETTING SOMETHING OFF THE ROOF. SUDDENLY THE CURTAIN
FROM AN UPSTAIRS WINDOW OPENED, AND A WOMAN WAS UNDRESSING INSIDE. I DONT KNOW IF SHE NOTICED ME OR NOT. I TALKED BIG,
BUT I WAS A REAL NERD. 'I' GOT EMBARRASSED AND CLIMBED DOWN THE LADDER. I TOLD THE GUY I WAS WORKING WITH ABOUT IT,
AND HE SAID DONT WORRY, NO BIG DEAL. I WENT HOME. THE NEXT DAY I WOULD BE WORKING WITH TWO OTHER GUYS. UNBEKNOWNST
TO ME THE GUY I WAS WORKING WITH CALLED THE GUYS I WOULD BE WORKING WITH AND TOLD THEM MY STORY OF THE LADY UNDRESSING IN
THE WINDOW. WHEN I ARRIVED TO WORK THE NEXT DAY, THEY WERE ALREADY THERE. THEY SEEMED EXCITED.
THEY TOLD ME THE POLICE WERE JUST THERE, AND THEY WERE LOOKING FOR A PEEPING TOM PERVERT. SOME CREEP WAS WATCHING THE
LADY UPSTAIRS UNDRESS..THIS NEIGHBORHOOD IS REALLY GOING DOWNHILL.... I WAS SPEECHLESS. THEN THEY WERE
TELLING ME THAT WHEN THE POLICE GOT THE GUY THEY WOULD PUT HIS NAME AND ADDRESS ON A SEXUAL PERVERTS LIST. AND THE PERVERTS
NEIGHBORS WOULD SEE IT... THEY SAID THE POLICE JUST TOOK THE WOMAN TO THE POLICE STATION, TO LOOK AT MUG
SHOTS..THEY ARN`T GOING TO TOLERATE THIS KIND OF STUFF BOY. THEY WERE PISSED. ESPECIALLY THE BIG COP. HIS WIFE
HAD A PROBLEM WITH A PERVERT ONCE. HE THINKS IT MIGHT BE THE SAME GUY.... THEY TOLD ME: AT FIRST THE LADY THOUGHT
IT WAS ONE OF THEM. BUT THEY SAID THEY WERE`NT EVEN HERE YESTERDAY...THEY ASKED ME WHAT TIME I LEFT LAST NIGHT?
DID I SEE ANYTHING STRANGE? .....I THINK I WAS TRYING TO SAY SOMETHING, BUT I`M NOT SURE. .THEN THEY
SAID 'HERE COME THE COPS NOW'....I WAS FROZEN. I WASN`T EVEN ABLE TO TURN AROUND, BUT THEIR LAUGHING GAVE IT AWAY.
BOY. WAS I SCARED...IT`S FUN WHAN YOU DO STUFF LIKE THAT TO OTHER PEOPLE, BUT..YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? ....american kamikaze
.....
...............american kamikaze...freedoms aviator............. *********.....& MY [american kamikaze]
FIRST LOVE. ..MANY PEOPLE HAVE EMAILED ME AND ASKED ME TO CONTINUE MY AUTO BIOGRAPHY.. I`VE ALREADY TOLD YOU
OF MY CHILDHOOD [somewhere on this site] ABOUT WHAT A LOSER I WAS......GIRLS WEREN`T INTERESTED IN ME.... I WAS A JERK.
NOT GOOD LOOKING. SHY, AND EVERYTHING...........THEN ONE GRAND DAY, AS I WAS READING A COMIC BOOK, THERE SHE WAS
ON AN ADVERTISEMENT PAGE....A LIFE SIZE, INFLATIBLE RUBBER GIRL DOLL.....IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT...I HAD COMPLETELY
FORGOTTEN THE PLOT OF THE COMIC BOOK. NOR DID I CARE TO READ ANY FURTHER....THE PAGE WAS FULL OF ADVERTISEMENTS, LIKE
THE GLASSES THAT COULD SEE THROUGH GIRLS CLOTHES[these glasses were a gyp], AND THE CARDBOARD SUBMARINE, AND YET SHE
WAS THE ONLY ADVERTISEMENT ON THE PAGE, TO ME.... ALTHOUGH MUCH MORE WAS BEING DISPLAYED, ALL I COULD SEE WERE HER EYES...THEY
LOOKED SO SAD.. I QUICKLY TORE THE ADVERTISEMENT OUT OF THE BOOK. NOT ONLY SO I COULD SEND AWAY, BUT ALSO BECAUSE WE
USED TO PASS THE COMIC BOOKS AROUND, AND I DIDN`T WANT ANYBODY ELSE TO SEE HER LIKE THIS.. ..IT SEEMED LIKE AN ETERNITY,
BUT FINALLY SHE ARRIVED....AS I SAID BEFORE. I`M VERY SHY, SO BREAKING THE ICE WAS A REAL PROBLEM. IN FACT WE DIDN`T
HAVE SEX UNTIL OUR FIFTH OR SIXTH DATE. WE USED TO GO BOWLING..SHE DIDN`T BOWL HERSELF, BUT SHE LIKED TO WATCH
ME. CHAIRS WERE VERY UNCOMFORTABLE FOR HER, AND I COULDN`T JUST LEAVE HER STANDING UP, SO SHE JUST SORTA LIKE
LEANED ON THE SCORING TABLE.... MANY TIMES, WHEN A TWOSOME ARE DIFFERENT LIKE THAT, PEOPLE WILL TALK......I
USED TO TAKE HER TO THE DRIVE IN. AND YET WE COULD STILL FIND NO PEACE. AT FIRST EVERYTHING WAS GOING
GREAT... I HAD HER PROPPED UP REAL CLOSE TO ME... SOMETIMES I WOULD PUT POPCORN IN HER MOUTH...SHE DIDN`T EAT VERY MUCH...THEN
THE GUYS THAT ALWAYS PICKED ON ME WOULD COME AROUND THE CAR AND WANT TO MEET MY GIRL. IT WAS LIKE SOME KIND
OF JOKE TO THEM..I USED TO COVER HER UP WITH A BLANKET, AND SAY THAT THEY WERE FRIGHTENING HER.....AS MUCH AS I LOVED HER,
DEEP DOWN IN MY HEART I HAD TO REALIZE THAT SHE WAS A RUBBER DOLL, AND IF THESE GUYS CAUGHT A GLIMPSE OF 'BLOWZIE',
I WAS GOING TO BE FOR SOME VERY HARD TIMES...SO I TOLD THEM TO STEP AWAY FROM THE CAR, AND SHE WOULD BE ALRIGHT AND COME OUT...
WHEN THEY BACKED OFF, I LET THE AIR OUT, FOLDED HER UP AND SLIPPED HER UNDER THE SEAT. ...THEN I TOLD THE HOOLIGANS THAT SHE
WAS EMBARRASED, AND RAN OFF....NOW ARE YOU FINALLY HAPPY????.....I REMEMBER WHEN I TOOK HER HOME TO MEET MY MOM AND
DAD. AS WE WERE SEATED[leaning] AROUND THE DINNER TABLE THERE WAS THE SMALL TALK, AND CHIT CHAT, BUT I
COULD JUST FEEL THE TENSION..I DONT THINK MOM AND DAD FELT FREE TO TALK OPENLY WITH BLOWZIE RIGHT THERE LIKE THAT, AND
BLOWZIE WAS ALWAYS VERY QUIET......FINALLY CAME THE FATEFUL DAY THAT I LOST BLOWZIE. FOREVER..WE WERE TAKING A WALK IN THE
PARK, AND IT WAS VERY VERY WINDY. I LET GO OF HER HAND FOR A MOMENT, TO GET HER A FLOWER, AND THAT`S WHEN IT HAPPENED..I
CRIED "BLOWZIE BLOWZIE' BUT IT WAS USELESS....I CHASED HER. I RAN LIKE I`VE NEVER RUN BEFORE..BUT IT WAS
TOO LATE..SHE WAS OVER THE TREES NOW, AND MOVING REAL FAST....I`LL NEVER FORGET THE LAST TIME I SAW HER... SURE,
I SEARCHED FOR HER. WOULDN`T YOU??.. I EVEN PUT AN AD IN THE NEWSPAPER.....NOTHING...I CAN ONLY HOPE SHE MET SOMEONE
WHO WOULD REALLY CARE FOR HER, AND RESPECT HER, INSTEAD OF JUST....JUST... WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN....sob..sob..sniffle......i`ll
be okay though..dont worry about that...i`ll be alright...sob..sniffle...honest i will.......%%%%%%%%%%% KAMIKAZES
TOP 5 LISTS.....TOP 5 BATHHOUSE SONGS.. : [ and dont ask me how i know this stuff, either. what are you trying
to imply?] # 5 HE`S A REBEL....#4 SHE`S NOT THERE ...# 3 HOT STUFF .... # 2 PLEASE
RELEASE ME # 1 LITTLE WILLY ...................TOP 5 TRAITORS TO THEIR RACE : #1
'CORNELIUS'. THE PLANETS OF THE APE CHIMP, WHO ALWAYS HELPED THE HUMANS......# 2. THE 'ANT' IN COMIC BOOK 'TALES TO
ASTONISH NO. 27, THAT SAVES A HUMAN FROM THE OTHER ANTS, THEN SEES THAT HUMAN BECOME 'ANT - MAN', WHO THEN TAKES CONTROL
OVER THE ANTS, MAKING THEM FIGHT AND DIE AGAINST SUPER POWERED CRIMINALS......#3 AND #4. TIE....DOCTOR JEKYLL
AND MR. HYDE......#5 UNCLE TOM NEGROES.//////////////TOP 5 GAY BATHOUSE SLOGANS OR PROMOTIONS IN SAN FRANCISCO*:
#5. ' YOU DROP IN. WE DROP SOAP'...#4. 'GERMAN HELMET CONTEST EVERY TUESDAY NIGHT'....#3. 'WE WIGGLE
WAG WHACK WHATEVER'.....#2. 'YOUNG MENS CLOTHES 1/2 OFF THIS WEEK.' # 1. 'MEMBERS ONLY"........*san francisco,
on market street, between 9th and 10th avenues, on the west side of the street, between addresses 937 and 979 inclusive..
airmail@americankamikaze.com
.*&^%$#@. &%$#$%....THE ONLY TYPE OF EMAIL I GET IS FROM HEATHENS IN SEARCH OF SOMEONE ELSES MISERY,
AND PAIN..THE ONES WHO CONSTANTLY CRAVE ANOTHER CHAPTER IN MY SORDID BOOK OF LIFE.....WELL.... THEY SAY ALWAYS BE GOOD TO
THE PEOPLE YOU MEET ON THE WAY UP, YOU KNOW. SO ...OKAY, I GUESS..I`LL TELL YOU.... WOULD YOU BELEIVE CHURCH THIS
TIME??..THERE I WAS SITTING IN CHURCH ONE SUNDAY, LOST IN AN INNOCENT FANTASY...THERE WAS A KID SITTING IN FRONT OF ME, WHO
ALWAYS USED TO PUSH ME AROUND...HE WAS A BULLY...EVERYBODY WAS A BULLY....I WAS THINKING ABOUT HOW NICE IT WOULD BE TO JUST
SMACK HIM IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD. YOU KNOW??..NOT A PUNCH. JUST A GOOD SMACK WITH SOME GUSTO TO IT.....YOU KNOW WHAT
I MEAN?? [i know what i mean]..JUST A LOVELY WHAPP SOUND..JUST ONE TIME GOING MY WAY, YOU KNOW??...ANYWAY, I WAS TAKEN AWAY
FROM MY DAYDREAM, NOTICING THE KID SEEM TO BE SQUIRMING AROUND QUITE A BIT...JUST THEN I BEGAN TO SMELL A FOUL ODER...I
THINK THE CREEP WAS HAVING SOME STOMACH PROBLEMS...IT WAS ALMOST WORTH THE SMELL [not quite. some sacrifices i`d rather
not make]........THEN SUDDENLY, JUST AS OTHERS WERE BECOMING AWARE OF THE SITUATION, HE CUTS A FART FROM THE DAWN OF
HISTORY, AT THE SAME TIME JUMPING UP, POINTING HIS FINGER IN MY FACE, AND YELLING.."YOU`RE A DISGRACE"...."WHAT`S THE
MATTER WITH YOU?",,,I WAS FROZEN..I WANTED TO YELL "HEY, THAT WASN`T ME", BUT I WAS FROZEN....I COULDN`T MOVE..IT WAS LIKE
I WAS WATCHING A MOVIE...NOW THE CREEP IS MAKING HIS WAY OUT OF THE AISLE, YELLING BACK AT ME."WOW..WHAT DID
YOU HAVE TO EAT?"..PEOPLE WERE STARTING TO LAUGH, AND OTHERS WERE POINTING AT ME.. EVEN THE PREIST WAS FIGHTING TO HOLD
BACK A CHUCKLE...WITH ALL MY HEART I JUST WANTED TO JUMP UP AND SAY "HEY, THAT WASN`T ME, YOUR HONOR. IT
WAS HIM..HONEST"...BUT I COULDN`T MOVE....I WAS IMMOBILIZED...HOW DO YOU PREPARE FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS..... NOW, EVERY FEW
SECONDS THERE WAS SOME INQUISITIVE VOICE ASKING "WHICH ONE WAS IT?"..."WHO? ..OVER THERE?" "WHO DID IT?"... 'HIM?'......AND
ALWAYS SOME JERK, OH SO WILLING, TO POINT ME OUT..LITTLE KIDS COULDN`T HIDE THEIR GLEE. ONE AFTER ONE, LITTLE HEADS WERE POPPING
UP TO LOOK AT ME...I WAS MORTIFIED......THIS VERY ELDERLY COUPLE A FEW OF ROWS AHEAD OF ME, WERE LOOKING BACK AT
ME WITH UNDERSTANDING AND KINDNESS ON THEIR FACES. AS SOON AS THEY TURNED AROUND THOUGH, THEY LOOKED AT EACH OTHER,
AND STARTED LAUGHING...I COULD SEE THEIR SHOULDERS SHAKING...WHY WAS I BORN??? .....THEN THIS OLD BAG SITTING DOWN THE
AISLE, WITH A NASTY SCOWL, ASKES ME REAL LOUD. "ARE YOU FINISHED?"....AT THAT VERY SECOND, I ACTUALLY WISH I HAD
CAUSED THE COMMOTION... THEN I WOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO SUMMON UP THE APPROPRIATE ANSWER FOR THAT OLD BAG... IN A
LANGUAGE SHE WOULD UNDERSTAND... "NO. I`M NOT FINISHED, YOU OLD BAG...IN FACT, HERE`S ONE FOR YOU....PUCKER UP.".....BUT
I WAS UNABLE TO MUSTER UP WHAT IT TAKES.......WHEN FACILITIES FINALLY RETURNED, I RAN OUT OF THE CHURCH........OUTSIDE
WERE SOME PEOPLE WHO HAD FLED GROUND ZERO RIGHT AFTER THE INITIAL BLAST....THEY WERE POINTING AT ME AND
LAUGHING...THEY ALWAYS LAUGHED.....I GAVE THEM THE FINGER, AND RAN OFF....SO THERE NOW..ARE YOU HAPPY?..DO YOU FEEL BETTER??....DID
YOU ENJOY A CHUCKLE AT SOMEONE ELSES EXPENSE, TODAY??.......american kamikaze...survivor of: my sordid book of life.
chapters in my novel of naught found all over this website.......%%%%%%%%%%%.......................,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,american
kamikaze...i say it once. from thence on: 'it is written'........... %%%%%% [ heres another charred
chapter from my sordid book of life] MANY HAVE ASKED THE KAMIKAZE..WHERE DO YOU COME FROM??, WITH THE HELP
OF ONLY A PAIR OF BINOCULARS, I COULD SHOW YOU....YET, I WILL TELL YOU OF MY CHILDHOOD [the one when i was very young]..I
WAS BORN AT A VERY YOUNG AGE, AND THEN IT WAS ALL DOWN HILL FROM THERE..AS A CHILD I HAD A COMBINATION OF THREE PROBLEMS,
THAT WHEN ALL INCORPERATED TOGETHER, WAS QUITE DEVISTATING...I WAS A SCRAWNY WEAKLING, WITH A WISE MOUTH, IN A ROUGH NEIGHBORHOOD.....THE
TRILOGY OF MY DOWNFALL...IT WASN`T PRETTY [for me. others had a lot of fun though]]....YES, I WAS THE GUY THAT IT WAS
EASY TO PICK ON...I WAS SO SKINNY, AND WITH A BIG NOSE.....THE CLOSEST I GOT TO ATHLETICS WAS BEING THE BACK UP JAVELIN FOR
THE TRACK TEAM.........A MOCKING WISEASS, THAT ANYYBODY WOULD WANT TO SMACK...AND MOST EVERYBODY DID...YEA, IT WASN`T EASY.......SO
ANYWAY, TIME MOVED ON , LIKE IT ALWAYS DOES....ALL THE GUYS I GREW UP WITH, WERE GETTING JOBS, MOVING OUT, GETTING GIRLFRIENDS,
AND STUFF LIKE THAT, SO I STARTED HANGING OUT WITH THEIR YOUNGER BROTHERS, AND THEIR BUDDIES....WOULDN`T YOU KNOW IT.
THESE GUYS STARTED USING ME AS THE NEIGHBORHOOD STOOP....I COULDN`T BELIEVE IT..I`VE KNOWN THESE GUYS WHEN THEY PRACTICALLY
BABIES...I COULD HAVE EASILY BEATEN THEM UP RIGHT IN THEIR BABY CARRIAGES. NO PROBLEM.....BUT I DIDN`T....AND THIS IS
THE GRATITUDE I GET........SO FINALLY, JUST WHEN I THOUGHT THINGS COULDN`T GET WORSE. THEY DIDN`T....I HAD BECOME SO MUCH
OF A PATSY, THAT SLAPPING ME AROUND WAS COMPLETELY OUT OF FASHION...SOMEONE WOULD BE PICKING ON ME, AND SOME GUYS, ACROSS
THE STREET WOULD YELL AT HIM "HEY LOUIE. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO NEXT..GO HOME AND BEAT YOUR MOTHER UP???..NOW I`M STARTING
TO STYLE...NOBODY IS PICKING ON ME ANYMORE.....NOW IS MY TIME....I`M BAD....I COULD JUST STRUT BY A BUNCH OF HOODLUMS ON THE
STREET COOL AS I WANTED TO BE..I COULD JUST SMIRK AT THESE GUYS, AND THE WORSE THEY WOULD DO IS GIVE ME THE FINGER, AND TELL
ME TO GET LOST...I WAS B.M.O.C. [big mook on the corner] OTHER PASSERBYS, AND CITIZENS, DIDN`T KNOW WHAT WAS GOING ON,
AND THEY WOULD LOOK AT ME AND SAY. "THAT GUY IS COOL" AND " WOW. WHAT A MAN"[i never actually heard anybody say that,
but i can tell from facial expressions]. DOESN`T IT SEEM ODD, THAT THE PERSON BEING PICKED ON IS NOT THE BULL-Y, AND
THE AGGRESSOR IS NOT THE BULL-ER?????...I DON`T KNOW..THE WAY PEOPLE CHANGE WORDS AROUND ANYMORE.. RADAR SCREEN SHOWS
UFK ON COLLISION COURSE WITH EARTH..................................######## .
AMERICAN KAMIKAZE.......DEAR DIARY..I WRITE IN YOU TODAY, BECAUSE I HAVE THE URGE TO LET IT ALL OUT. IT MAKES ME
FEEL BETTER. ON MY WEB SITE, THEY LAUGH AT ME........THEY ALWAYS LAUGH...THIS NEXT CHAPTER IS NOT RACIAL IN CONTENT..NOT
IN ANY WAY..ALTHOUGH IT CONTAINS BLACK CHARACTERS THAT BULLY ME, I CAN ASSURE YOU THAT BULLYING ME, AND PICKING ON ME WAS
A COLORBLIND SITUATION..I WAS ALSO VERY AGE FRENDLY. KIDS AS YOUNG AS NINE OR TEN WOULD GIVE ME A HARD TIME, THE SAME AS REAL
OLD LADIES IN THEIR NINTIES, WOULD...AND WORSE OF ALL, IT WAS BEFORE I COULD CLAIM DIVERSITY, AND INCLUSION, AND EQUAL OPPERTUNITY,
AND STUFF...I LEARNED EARLY ABOUT REAL LITTLE KIDS[ in their late single, or very early double digits], AND REAL OLD
LADIES IN THEIR NINTIES AND STUFF....THEY`RE ALL ALIKE..THEY AINT SHIT WHEN THEY`RE BY THEMSELVES..BUT GET TWO OR THREE OF
THEM TOGEATHER, AND ALL OF A SUDDEN THEY GOT A BIG MOUTH..YOU KNOW??..SO ANYWAY, I WAS WALKING DOWN THE STREET, AND THERE
WERE THESE TWO BLACK GUYS TALKING...THEY LOOKED OVER AT ME...ONE OF THEM SAID " COME HERE, FOOL." I GLANCED AROUND, BUT I
HAD A GUT FEELING HE WAS TALKING TO ME. SO I WALKED OVER 'YES SIR.THANK YOU . THANK YOU" I SAID......HE SAID "LOOK.
I JUST BET THIS NIGGER HERE FIFTY DOLLARS, AND SAID I WAS BLACKER THEN HE IS....HE CLAIMS TO BE BLACKER THEN ME.. NOW WE NEED
YOU TO MAKE AN IMPARTIAL DECISION" ..RIGHT THEN HE GRABBED ME BY THE FRONT OF MY SHIRT. AND SAID " I
MADE A BET MOTHERFUCKER. AND MOTHERFUCKER, I HATE TO LOSE..YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN??..WELL. YEA, I GUESS. I COULD
UNDERSTAND THAT....NOBODY LIKES TO LOSE..... SO I TURNED AROUND TO LOOK AT THE OTHER GUY[ who i`ll call contestant # 2] AND,..WHA...
OH. SHIT...OH SHIT...THIS IS THE BLACKEST GUY I`VE EVER SEEN IN MY WHOLE LIFE.....IN ALL MY FUCKIN` BORN DAYS I`VE NEVER SEEN
ANYTHING LIKE THIS..... THEN HE GRABS ME BY MY SHIRT..STARES ME DOWN, LIKE A DOG, AND SAID WORDS I WOULD NEVER FORGET...HE
SAID..." NO MAN IS SO ANGRY, AS A VICTOR DENIED" ..I THOUGHT, MISTER I COULDN`T DENY YOU ANYTHING... NOBODY
COULD....THIS GUY WAS SO BLACK THAT I FORGOT MY PREDICAMENT FOR A FEW MOMENTS..I WONDERED IF THERE WAS SOME WAY TO INVEST
IN HIM..MAYBE HAVE SOME KIND OF A TOURNAMENT, OR SOMETHING.....I WAS AWOKEN FROM MY DAYDREAM BY THE SOUND OF CONTESTENT
NUMBER ONE, PUNCHING HIS RIGHT FIST INTO HIS LEFT PALM. IT MADE A SHARP SMACKING TYPE SOUND..ONLY REAL LOUD..,,"MOTHERFUCKER,"
HE SAID " WHICH ONE OF US IS BLACKER?"....I LOOKED AT HIM FOR A MINUTE. HE WAS ACTUALLY A LIGHT SKINNED BLACK GUY..,I
THOUGHT TO MYSELF ; HOW COULD THIS GUY BE SO FUCKIN` STUPID TO MAKE A BET LIKE THIS?... AND HERE`S A GUY THAT SAYS HE
HATES TO LOSE....GO FIGURE.......I LOOK BACK AT # 2, AND HE`S PARTIALLY IN THE DARK...I CANT SEE A MOTHERFUCKER, EXCEPT FOR TWO
EYES GLARING AT ME......I`M IN A SPOT HERE. I GOTTA THINK OF SOMETHING QUICK.....SO I ASK, IF MAYBE TALENT IS INVOLVED, OR
SOMETHING, LIKE MAYBE THE MISS AMERICA PAGENT OR SOMETHING. YOU KNOW??...DOES EITHER OF YOU TWO GUYS WANT TO SAVE THE WORLD,
OR ANYTHING??..EVEN THOUGH I`M LOOKING IN ANOTHER DIRECTION, EVERY TIME I TRIED TO STALL I COULD FEEL CONTESTANT
NUMBER TWOS EYES BURNING INTO THE BACK OF MY HEAD.. HE SAYS THREATENINGLY " YOU DONT THINK I EARNED IT, MOTHERFUCKER??..... THERE`S
NO WAY I CAN DENY THIS GUY..NO WAY..I`D GO TO HELL IF I TOLD A LIE LIKE THAT....THEN I ASKED THEM, PERHAPS, IF THERE
WAS ANY SPREAD INVOLVED...YOU KNOW, LIKE WHEN YOU BET ON SPORTS. ..SOME TEAMS GET POINTS..OR ODDS, OR WHATEVER. I DONT
KNOW, MAYBE A FEW SKIN SHADES?? I DONT KNOW..I DONT REALLY HAVE THE CREDENTIALS TO MAKE DECISIONS LIKE THIS.......JUST
THEN THIS REAL OLD LADY, WHO I HATED DEEPLY ONLY TWENTY FOUR HOURS AGO, COMES TO MY RESCUE..MRS. GRANLEY. ALONG WITH TWO POLICEMEN
IN A PATROL CAR.......THE DAY BEFORE, I HAD TRIED TO SNATCH HER PURSE. SHE RESISTED, AND AFTER A BRIEF SCUFFLE, I RAN
OFF EMPTY HANDED. THEN SHE CALLED THE COPS.....THE REASON THAT I HATED HER SO MUCH, IS BECAUSE SHE DIDN`T ACTUALLY LOSE
ANYTHING, AND GOT THE BETTER PART OF THE FIGHT [she hurt my wrist], AND THEN SHE STILLS TELLS THE COPS..WHAT
A SCUM BAG....THE OLD FART...LIKE WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT, LADY??...BUT THAT WAS YESTERDAY... TODAY HER WORDS ARE LIKE
SWEET MUSIC TO MY EARS.."THAT`S HIM, THAT`S HIM" SHE`S YELLING. " HE`S THE ONE, OFFICER"......THANK YOU DIARY.
I`M FEELING ALOT BETTER NOW.... ...@@@@@@@@@@@
.....HEAD CANDY........ ....MORE WHIMSICAL WORDS....ANOTHER CHEERLESS CHAPTER IN MY SORDID BOOK OF LIFE.......THAT
SIGNPOST UP AHEAD...NEXT STOP...THE KAMIKAZE ZONE. [da da da da daa]....I WASN`T ALWAYS THE SENSITIVE, DIVERSE, MULTI
CULTURAL, ULTRA TOLERENT, PEOPLE PERSON, THAT HUMBLY WRITES THESE WORDS TODAY.....WHEN I WAS YOUNG, MID TEENS, I WAS
CALLED PRICK [prick being the average of the things i was called back then. not the best. not the worse..you know..just
average.].HORROR MOVIES WERE REAL BIG THEN...I USED TO GO TO THE MOVIES FOR THE FIRST SHOW, AND TAKE NOTE OF ALL THE
ABSOLUTELY SCARIEST PARTS, THEN AT THE SECOND SHOW I WOULD SNEAK UP BEHIND PEOPLE, AND JUST AS THE SCARIEST PART HAPPENED,
JUST WHEN THEY PULL BACK THE CURTAIN, AND THERE`S THE GHOUL, I WOULD PUT MY HAND ON THEIR SHOULDER, AND GROWL.AAAGGGHHH....I
CAN TELL YOU THAT I`VE SEEN SOME HIGH JUMPERS, SOME LOW CRAWLERS, SOME FAST TAKE OFFS, AND HUMAN BATTERING RAMS....I`VE SEEN
APLENTY......WELL PEOPLE GO TO HORROR MOVIES TO GET SCARED, RIGHT?? SO DONT CALL ME A PRICK..WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE??...ANYWAY,
I WAS A REAL MENACE..I USED TO GET KICKED OUT OF THE THEATRE, THEN SNEAK BACK IN AGAIN....I WAS SOMEBODY.......THEN CAME PAPER
ARM....PEOPLE CALLED HIM PAPER ARM IN JEST, BECAUSE HE COULD THROW VERY HARD....EXTREMLY VERY HARD AND FAST....HE WOULD HAVE
BEEN A GREAT BASEBALL PITCHER, BUT HE WAS TOO WILD..HE WAS REAL BIG AND STRONG.....FOR WHATEVER REASON, PAPER ARM STARTED
COMING TO THE MOVIE THEATER..ALWAYS SITTING IN THE LAST ROW....BUYING YEAR OLD STALE JUJYFRUITS IN THE CANDY MACHINE, AND
JUST WHIPPING THEM AT PEOPLE ALL OVER THE THEATER.[remember jujyfruits? they were fairly soft, and edible..no so after a years
in storage..you cant bite them. you cant cut them. if you hit them with a hammer they will shatter. sometimes..thats how hard
these are.] AND PAPER ARM IS FIRING THESE THINGS ALL OVER THE THEATER WITH INCREDIBLE VELOCITY....NOBODY WOULD MESS WITH PAPER
ARM...NOT EVEN GROWN UPS.....IN FACT IT WAS AVANT GUARD FOR THE HIPSTERS TO WEAR BASEBALL HELMETS, AND HAVE A FEW ROCK
HARD JUJYFRUITS BOUNCE OFF THEM EVERY NOW AND THEN, OVER THE COURSE OF THE SHOW......I REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME I GOT
HIT.......PAPER ARM WAS THROWING AT THIS OLD COUPLE BY THE EMERGENCY DOOR.THEY TRIED TO GET OUT BUT THE DOOR WAS
LOCKED....I WAS LOOKING, AND LAUGHING, KINDA LIKE ON HIS SIDE, YOU KNOW. I TURNED AROUND TO SEE THE MOVIE, AND CRACK...RIGHT
IN THE BACK OF MY HEAD....I DIDN`T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.....CRACK. CRACK. TWO MORE JUJYFRUITS EXPLODED ON THE BACK OF MY SEAT....I
DUCKED DOWN TO SAFETY OUT OF INSTINCT.....YOU SEE...PAPER ARM WAS LEFT HANDED. HE HAD A REGIMEN TO KEEP HIS
THROWING ARM STRONG ....THE DRIVERS SIDE DOOR TO HIS BEAT UP OLD CAR WAS COMPLETELY UNATTACHED.....PAPER ARM WOULD
HOLD THE UNATTACHED CAR DOOR IN PLACE, WITH HIS ELBOW OUT THE WINDOW, AND DRIVE AROUND TOWN AS CALMLY AND NATURALLY
AS SOMEONE WOULD, WHO WAS NOT HOLDING A CAR DOOR IN PLACE[only difference. paper arm couldn`t wave with his left
hand. he never waved to anybody anyway]]...AND NOT ONLY DRIVING AROUND TOWN, BUT EVEN ON LONG TRIPS....SO YOU CAN BEGIN TO
REALIZE WHAT A MENACE THIS GUY WAS....HE MADE ME FEEL SMALL AS A MENACE...... YOU WANT TO KNOW SUSPENSE??...HE WOULD GET UP..WALK
OUT TO THE CANDY MACHINE...YOU COULD HEAR HIM PULLING THAT CRANK... CA - CHUNK...CA - CHUNK. KA CHUNK...AND YOU
COULD HEAR BOX AFTER BOX OF BULLET LIKE JUJYFRUITS SLAMMING INTO THE TRAY, AS THOUGH THEY WERE CARTRIDGE MAGAZINES BEING
LOCKED AND LOADED.......YOU TALK ABOUT HORROR?? YOU TALK ABOUT SUSPENSE??.."OH SHIT..HERE HE COMES..AND HE WASN`T BUYING
MARSHMELLOWS"...........EVEN THE COPS WERE AFRAID OF PAPER ARM....THEN PEOPLE STARTED TO PAY PAPER ARM TO LET THEM SIT IN
THE LEFT SECTION OF THE THEATER PEACEFULLY, AND NOT PEPPER THEM IN THE HEAD WITH STALE JUJYFRUITS.[he couldn`t get top velocity lefthanded
in that direction anyway]....I WASN`T EVEN IN THE SAME LEAGUE WITH THIS GUY AS FAR AS BEING SOMEBODY.....PAPER ARM BECAME
FAMOUS..EVEN THE LOCAL BANDS USED TO SING ABOUT HIM.....WELL..SO MUCH FOR NOW..I`M SLEEPY, AND I`M ALL DEPRESSED AGAIN.......american
kamikaze........head candy
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